'My parents (retired) are going on their 10th+ vacation this year:' Entitled parents ask 31-year-old son to move home for a month to dog sit for free, despite it forcing a 2+ hour commute

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 11, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

Doing favors for your family is a nice thing to do. It's a nice way to have a meaningful back and forth with those whom you love the most. They would likely do the same for you when you're in need, so the least you can do is do something for them in return. It fosters closeness and is a gesture of goodwill. But there are, of course, limits on what should count as a favor and what counts as employment. Picking their kids up from school when they have an appointment? A nice gesture. Picking them up from school every day until the end of time? Not so much a favor as it is a job that someone would command a healthy salary to do. 

Cooking them dinner while they're sick? A beautiful way to be of service to a loved one. Cooking dinner for them every night because they don't feel like cooking? You might as well hire a private chef. The difference between kindness and taking advantage of someone can be a thin line, but one that needs to be respected. 

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  • A man pets a dog while sitting on a curb.
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • This story is an example of a family member trying to control their loved ones, not giving them a chance to do a favor. There is a big difference. Forcing someone to leave their homes for a month is certainly a big ask. So they asked the internet whether they thought this was reasonable. 

  • AITA for not wanting to move back home for a month to petsit?

    Edit: I called this dog "my childhood dog" in a reply and many assumed this meant that this was my dog and not my parents? what I meant is that they adopted him while me and my siblings still lived there and that I am attached to him. I wasn't the one to buy this dog.
    via u/juyonchan
  • My parents (retired) are going on their 10th+ vacation this year and since the place they want to go doesn't allow pets and sitters charge too much, they just asked me (M31) to move back and live in their home for a month to take care of the dog. I cannot pet sit at my appartement because i'm not allowed animals and the dog barks like crazy.
    via u/juyonchan
  • They expect me to live and commute from there and are asking me only since my two siblings have young kids. The many issues I have with this are :
    via u/juyonchan
  • I'm really uncomfortable in other people places and without my routine, (I'm suspected au tic) and previous events where I had to stay over for more then a week really wreaked my mental health before, so i really don't want to do it. I would be paying rent and other bills for nothing as i wouldn't be home and it feels like a waste.
    via u/juyonchan
  • They are always complaining about not being able to go to places they want because of the dog, so I feel like if I do it once, they will expect me to do it again multiple times a year. So, AITA for feeling like what thay are asking me is unreasonable?
    via u/juyonchan
  • Edit: i cannot visit multiple times per day to take care of him because i do not have a car (as I live in the middle of the city close to work) and they live in a far suburb with only an hourly bus. I'm also unable to take my bike because the trip will be in the middle of January
    via u/juyonchan

  • Commenters weighed in on this situation.

    ShineAtom • 22h ago NTA. If your parents can afford ten holidays a year then they can afford to pay for sitter or for kennels. and yes, they probably would expect you to do it more. If they want to go places where pets are not allowed, they need to have
    via u/ShineAtom
  • thought of that before getting the dog - although, to be fair, they may well have had the dog prior to retirement. Even if that is the case then they need to plan things more carefully. I seem to remember a phrase: Cut your coat according to your cloth. So plan things that are within your means whether financial or otherwise.
    via u/ShineAtom
  • zojono • 18h ago It's crazy to me that OP stated in a comment that this is his childhood dog, which so obviously means the dog that his PARENTS bought while he was a CHILD (assuming teenager due to OP's age) in the family home, and some of you have gone absolutely feral on him in the comments saying it's his responsibility to sort out care for the dog.
    via u/zojono
  • OP, you are so NTA. You have said that you would have gladly adopted this dog away from your parents had your living arrangements allowed, and I'm assuming that is both because you love the dog, but also because of situations like the one you are currently describing with your parents.
    via u/zojono
  • If your parents can afford 10 vacations in a year, one of those being a month long, they can afford to pay for care for the animal that THEY chose to adopt many years ago. Would it have been nice if you could have stayed with the dog? Sure! But you can't, so they need to make other arrangements.
    via u/zojono
  • A man pets a dog sitting on a stoop.
    via Unsplash+ (Mariela Ferbo)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Every-Pepper77 • 22h ago NTA - A weekend would be one thing and probably doable. A week would be pushing it. A month is so insane that I can hardly believe they think this is okay, esp. for someone who has the issues with routine and environment that you described. I mean, it's not like
    via u/Every-Pepper77
  • this month-long absense just came up - they *planned* it. knowing they couldn't take their dog. If they can afford 10+ vacations already this year, then they can afford to hire a pet sitter, even if they have to shorten their trip to pay for it. Please do not back down, do not apologize, do not offer an alternative for them. It is completely on them that they are in this situation.
    via u/Every-Pepper77
  • Outrageous-Banan... . 21h ago And you would definitely become the default pet sitter. I can hear it now, you did it once and everything was okay, so what's the problem now? Not your dog, not your problem.
    via u/Outrageous-Banana905
  • peakerforlife • 21h ago NTA. If they can afford all of these vacations, they can afford a pet sitter. Keep saying no. You don't have to sacrifice your wellbeing for their convenience.
    via u/peakerforlife
  • late-nineteenth 19h ago • NTA, if they can afford 10+ vacations in a year then they can afford to put the dog in a kennel or hire a sitter. Just say no, you can't do it. Don't give any explanation because they will argue and suggest ways to make it work. Just say you cannot do it. End of discussion.
    via u/late-nineteenth
  • It's okay if their feelings are hurt, or if they are unhappy. That's life. It's unreasonable to ask you to uproot your life for their vacation. They should not have planned on going somewhere they can't take the dog if they don't want to hire professional care for said dog.
    via u/late-nineteenth
  • Puzzleheaded-Valu... 21h ago No way. You have to commute by bus over 2 hours a day for a month to make this work? They need to budget pet sitting into the cost of their trips, full stop, or find a family member/friend who is able to accomodate. You aren't.
    via u/Puzzleheaded-Value38
  • Youwhooo60 · 22h ago NTA. You are under no obligation to babysit the dog/cat or parakeet. If they want to travel, they need to make arrangements for that. They asked, you said (should say) "No." and that's that.
    via u/Youwhooo60
  • Technical-Habit-51... 21h ago Nta. If they can afford 10 vacations in a year, they can afford a house sitter for a month
    via u/Technical-Habit-5114
  • WhatInTheAssPep... • 19h ago NTA. It's their 10+ vacation of the year. If they want to travel that much, they either need to figure out how to travel with their dog... or figure out an alternative plan for where to place the dog when they're away from home. Do your siblings with kids live close enough that they can take the
    via u/WhatInTheA**Pepper
  • dog home with them for the month so they don't need to travel back and forth? Tell your parents you will not be moving back home, and that they need to make other arrangements. You can help. your parents figure out an alternative arrangement, but other than that, don't allow it to become your problem. People with pets need to learn how to manage that responsibility.
    via u/WhatInTheA**Pepper
  • Adorable_Click9074 22h ago NTA. "No" is a complete sentence. Do not add to that. Just "no." Otherwise, you give them ammunition to argue with you about it.
    via u/Adorable_Click9074
  • . paisleyheavenly • 22h ago nah you're not the a h le at all. that's a huge ask and honestly kinda selfish of them to assume you'd just uproot your whole life for a month so they can vacation again. you're an adult with bills, routines, and your own mental health to look after, not their free live-in pet sitter. they chose to have a dog, they can figure out how to handle it without dumping the responsibility on you.
    via u/paisleyheavenly
  • Spare_Ad5009 • 21h ago NTA. Tell them to ask your siblings to rotate walking and feeding the dog, because you can't. If they can afford ten vacations, they can afford a pet sitter or a kennel.
    via u/Spare_Ad5009
  • justisme333 · 20h ago NTA. Set your boundary and don't feel bad about it. They can pay a house sitter, pay for doggy daycare, rehome the dog, or only pick holidays where the dog can come with.
    via u/justisme333
  • See, they have plenty of options. A simple 'no thanks, not interested.' Is all you have to say and just tune out the complaints.
    via u/justisme333
  • . Equivalent-Speed-... 18h ago Could you watch the dog for part of the time and then they use a pet sitter or kennel for the rest?
    via u/Equivalent-Speed-631
  • TurbulentWalrus12... • 21h ago NTA, they can hire a pet sitter. Though you might offer to be a backup in case of emergency. That said, if parents are going away and you do want to assist them for this one time (or once in a while) you
    via u/TurbulentWalrus1222
  • should be able to drive their car(s) while they are gone. (assuming you drive). And you can absolutely ask them to pay for the gas, parking fees for when you are at home to check on things there, etc.
    via u/TurbulentWalrus1222
  • r-d-hameetman 21h ago NTA. If they can afford so many vacations, they can definitely afford a dog sitter or kennel.
    via u/r-d-hameetman
  • Say no in person calmly but firmly. Then do it by text. If they don't confirm. Send it again after a couple days. Worst case, you can try to leave for vacation 1-2 days before they do. They'll hire a dog sitter or find a kennel.
    via u/r-d-hameetman

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petsitting dogs aita pets kids moms parenting dad cute kids reddit thread parent Reddit raising kids adult children Parenting Fail dogsitting parents children entitled people Parenting FAILS
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